After reading this review by Sage I added Skinny Dip to my wish list. I was thrilled to find it under the tree Christmas morning. Carl Hiaasen is an absolute hoot to read. Definitely a writer I will add to my must read list.

We all know someone like Chaz Perrone. You know, the ultimate moron who thinks he’s all that and a bag of chips. Chaz has an ego to make up for any other deficiencies he may have. He conned his way through to a PhD and doesn’t have a bit of knowledge to show for it. In fact, it is his lack of knowledge that ultimately does him in. Thinking he has planned the perfect crime he books an anniversary cruise where he tosses his wife over the side of a ship. One, he forgot his wife was a champion swimmer. Two, his biology study and PhD prep didn’t sink in because he couldn’t recall which way the Gulf Stream runs. Big deal? Yes, if you hope it will carry your dead wifes body away. So proud of his successful murder he plays the grieving husband…or tries too. He’s too busy trying to satisfy his sexual urges.

Why did he throw his wife overboard? Chaz, being the paranoid egomaniac that he was, thought Joey had figured out he was doctoring water samples for his boss who was dumping toxic levels of farm waste into the Everglades. Joey survived the murder attempt by clinging to a bail of pot after exhausting herself from a treacherous dive and extensive swimming. Her rescuer was a retired cop and island dwelling loner. At first he wasn’t thrilled with the idea of not reporting the murder attempt, but the excitement of revenge soon grew on him. Together they managed to really play with Chaz’s paranoid emotions.

The paranoia getting to him Chaz runs to his boss for help and is assigned a body guard with his own set of problems. Tool, with a bullet up his butt, isn’t a guy you want to mess with. Tool manages his pain by stealing fentanyl patches from nursing home patients. The big oaf he was, he did have a soft side. He liked to collect roadside crosses. You know, the ones staked on the side of the road where accidents have occurred. *strange* Overtime, Chaz’s paranoia grows. He eventually tries to off his mistress and then his bodyguard. Fails.

Not to be too much of a spoiler, but Chaz sucks at the murder business and he’s an idiot.

Hiaasen tells a great story and I have no idea how Sage listened to this book on his iPod at the gym and didn’t embarrass himself. It was highly amusing all the way through. If you have an issue with language and sexual overtones this is probably not the book for you. Actually, it isn’t only the overtones…there are some rather overt parts as well. For a better review check out Sage or this guy.

My opinion?

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Relaxing to the sounds of: Earth, Wind & Fire - September
via FoxyTunes

The less routine the more life.
Amos Bronson Alcott

Not everything has to be planned. Some of the best moments just happen.

Borrowed from Tense Teacher.

I am determined to get through Blog 365 and have made it 10 days! YES only 355 to go. (We get Feb 29th off.) You guys know that some days you just don’t feel like posting or you don’t have much to say. Blog things, memes, and other gimmicks help keep you regular…errr, posting regularly. So today (and other Friday’s I am sure) you will find a 5things list.

5 Things accomplished this week.

1. One of my goals for this week was to get the kids (the birthlings) back into their routine. In bed, reading, by 8:00 and lights out at 8:30. We didn’t make the goal every night, but we made steps in the right direction.

2. Another goal was to get any grades issued this week logged into the system by leaving time Friday. Woohoo, go me. I managed to enter both grades for general and several grades for advanced. This is truly an accomplishment for me.

3. Accomplishment three is about teaching. I worked my tush off this week to make the ‘08 start a good one. My lessons were done, although not entered because the system would not let me in during the early part of the week. Gotta love technology. Not only were the lessons done, but I didn’t take the easy road. I searched for ways to make the French Revolution interesting and relevant to them. They were attentive and participatory. That is tons more than I can say for December. Honestly, what I have to say for December wouldn’t make it past your work word filters.

4. I didn’t hurt anyone and managed to make it up, out, and on time everyday. Thank you Djembe ~*~

5. On the Blog 365 front…I posted each day. Congrats to other 365′rs! I have a list on the side. If you are visiting 365′r leave a comment and I’ll add you to the list and I commit to comment! Happy blogging, happy weekend.

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Relaxing to the sounds of: Bob James - Maputo
via FoxyTunes

It’s late afternoon. The boys are dancing and jiving to the music in their head. . . trying to impress the girls of course. Silliness abounds. A spider or two lurks in the corner. The girls look on, they are not amused. It’s loud. It’s smelly.

2:45 and we were still stuck in the locker room below our classroom. *ew*

As afternoon approached many schools around us were preparing for early dismissal. Severe weather was expected and the schools wanted to get the kids home before it started. My system decided not to dismiss early. This actually makes sense to me. Not all parents can come get their kids and not all kids have a weather safe home to go to. Nothing is stopping parents from checking their children out of school either. Parents started coming just before lunch. It was rather amusing to watch. By 9th grade lunch/study I had several students in first study and only one in second. The next period six of 16 students were there. I let them hang out. We talked about birds in the state and how weather radar works. It wasn’t a total educational loss. We were watching how the storms were splitting just before our city when the announcement was made to get to our safe place. It was really a surprise. No thunder. No lightening. No rain. Just wind…lots of wind.

I told them where to go and gathered up. From that classroom our safe place is in the hallway beside the gym. Since that hallway is nothing but a wind tunnel we moved the students into the boys locker room. Again I say *ew*.

Parents were still coming. We’re under a tornado warning and announcements are being made for this, that and the other student. My students were great. They did exactly what I needed them to do and took it seriously. The others were pretty good as well. The storms were all around us, but all we were getting was wind. By 2:20 students were restless and not thrilled with sitting in the locker room. By 2:40 the warning was lifted. We didn’t return to our rooms, but around 2:50 we allowed our locker room hostages to move to the gym and await the end of school.

The local forums are back and forth on the bus issue. Being the fence rider that I am, I can certainly see both sides. I still lean on the side that it isn’t necessary to let school out and has the potential to be even more dangerous. If parents are able to pick up their kids then fine. If not, follow the emergency plan.

What do you think? Close, send students home early or stay open, follow plan while allowing check outs?

Hope everyone is having a great day! Be by to visit your cyber home soon! Those in southern US, and other parts, stay safe its gonna be nasty today!

You Are a Cappuccino

You’re fun, outgoing, and you love to try anything new. However, you tend to have strong opinions on what you like. You are a total girly girly at heart - and prefer your coffee with good conversation. You’re the type that seems complex to outsiders, but in reality, you are easy to please

Girly, girly??? Bahahahaha. Nope, not me

For the past several nights I have been working my tush off on a PowerPoint of the French Revolution. Here’s the deal, it may or may not get used in class. Not all of the rooms I float to have the capability to project. Sometime when I’m not having to correct every other spelling error b/c I’m so wiped out I will share why. I worked and I worked and I worked and I worked…Then I made my first publish to slideshare.net

My current message:

I hope it posts b/c I would love to be able to post the thing on my school site. Here’s my big issue. I create in Office 2007, but have to save in then 2003 format. Crudmuffins, it always messes up the fonts or spacing. This means that if I desire to continue publishing on slideshare.net I will have modify all my publications to accommodate for their lack of updating. Is it really worth it?

OOOEEEE guess what! It worked and I don’t have to edit the spacing! This makes me very happy.

Now I shall share…It is rather simple, but VERY wordy. Students will have a printout that does not include all slides. They will have to condense the information, based on the “so what does this mean” slides that they will not be given in the handout. Watching, listening, and notetaking will be key activities.

Since this is for the purpose of review I lifted the content from a Sparknotes summary and will be adding to it in class. woo-hoo.

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I know today was the first day back, but in only 12 days we will be out for MLK and have a three day weekend. That’s only two school weeks. Since I’m already behind I will visit when I catch up, or when I refuse to continue…

We are entering the first full week of 2008. Tomorrow will be the first day back to school. The girls are all curled up snug in their beds…or they are supposed to be but I hear noises coming from the hallway.

-back after several minutes-
O-M-G.

Two nights in a row. TWO. I blame myself. For what? Oh, it’s a joy lemme tell ya…

THIS-

Ew- you say. YES ew. Silly putty. IN MY CHILD’S HAIR….A-freakin-gain! Why didn’t I throw it away last night? Because she likes the stuff and I didn’t think that she would get it in her hair…again. Last night it was funny. Tonight, not so much. She wasn’t going to tell me, but as I stated I heard something in the hall. That turned out to be her with the baby oil combing silly putty out of her hair. Lil Bit is our sneaky child. If she makes a mess she will clean it up before you find out. If she tries to light her candle but ends up setting birthday cards on fire instead, she will put out the fire and hope you don’t smell it. If she gets silly putty in her hair she will not come to you first, she will try to get it out herself and come only when she finds that is not possible. However, after she has seen you do it once she’s good for the next time.

This child. Really, I love the self sufficiency but she takes it to a whole new (and dangerous) level.

I was going to list my goals for the week, but they have changed…

Moving to number 1- have my children in bed reading by 8 and lights out at 8:30.
All silly putty will be disposed of.

#2- Lesson plans in.

#3- Any grades taken this week need to be in the system by the end of the day on Friday. The end of the day shall be understood to be 11 PM when the system shuts down for its backup.

#4- By the end of the week have my class folder together and reorganized for the new semester. Some of you may refer to this as a gradebook. Think of it as a modified gradebook in a binder, suitable to hand over for a sub if necessary and perfect for my floating teacher needs. (I have to get a room or a new position.)

#5- To get up on time and not make the frantic dash to school at 7:30. Really, this is a big one for me.

In order to get a good start on #5 I must say good night.

A high-school teacher, after all, is a person deputized by the rest of us to explain to the young what sort of world they are living in, and to defend, if possible, the part their elders are playing in it
Emile Capouya