I can stop anytime I want. I don’t have to have it. I mean, its just my lifeline to the world and we didn’t use to have it. It’s just three days and I don’t need it anyway. OK…fine. I’m a ‘net junkie. I can admit it. However, I do embrace the next three days with limited ‘net activity. It will be wonderful to relax in my cabin in the woods, just minutes from my interview site.

10 AM Tuesday…send good vibes my way!

I have not dropped off the face of the Earth. Still here, just consumed. Jem is about to start July term, I have an interview Tuesday, and I lack motivation to journal. I have thoroughly enjoyed being home for the summer and relaxing with little to do. If things go well with my interview everything will race full speed ahead and the “little to do” will be just a memory. I like to have many irons in the fire so I do look forward to the chaos. At this point, I hope there is chaos to look forward to.

This post is to update a previous post: Here Kitty Kitty

I went home to visit family and discovered that Grits, the cat, was huge. Her behavior was a little strange. VERY friendly, nesting, and she was even lactating. A quick Google search produced information leading to the determination that she was due to deliver soon. While visiting I kept an eye on her and set up her delivery box. Panting and nesting, but no kittens. Just before leaving this morning I decided to check on her one last time…my departure time was delayed because it was time for the new arrivals. She produced the first kitten with a yeow, and did everything she was supposed to do. The second kitten came backwards. After getting him going it is obvious that he will dance to his own tune. He had difficulty breathing at first and was slow to move about, but when he finally got his breath he was a crier and mover. The third and fourth came as they should. A little smaller than the first two, they will have to become assertive if they wish to thrive.

This young kitty did very well and delivered four kittens with few problems. Very cute and very cool.

?edit?
SHE HAD A FIFTH ONE! Such a good mommy kitty too.

Oh my. This was amazing. Since Jem has to work all weekend and I’m going to be out and about most of it, we’ve been celebrating all week. Jem has cooked for me and even baked for me.

Below you will find the experience that inspired the title of this post. It is a sweet tooth, wrapped in a sugar high, with a side of diabetic coma. It is SO good. What is it? A butterfinger cake and amazing it is.

How’s it made?
Yellow cake with holes poked then caramel and condensed milk dribbled, butterfinger sprinkled, cooled. Cool whip for icing, sprinkled again with butterfinger and dribbled again with caramel and chocolate sauce. Warm it is yummy, chilled it is amazing.

It is my new favorite cake.

It isn’t that I mind my blog readers reading everything in this post, but sometimes you just want to keep some things for those who are the frequent readers. Like Tense, I will say if you want to read then feel free to register and if approved then you can satisfy your curiosity. No worries, none of the regulars will have any problem with approval LOL.

I haven’t written a ton about my current teaching placement because I view it with such frustration. Inspired by Tense I decided to address a year ending frustration.

[private]Due to my non-tenure status it was required that I have three evaluations this year. One would be announced and then two un-announced. After each evaluation you are supposed to sit down with admin (within one week of the eval) and discuss the positives and negatives. My first evaluation went well, no problems. I knew it was coming, selected the class for it to happen in, and planned accordingly. The second evaluation you may remember I detailed in The Worst Screw Up EVER I was tardy to first period and admin was waiting. The third evaluation was not really announced and planned for, but I did find out on the day of that it was going to happen. Oh joy. It too was a no worries kind of day. Really, I don’t worry about evals. I am going to teach my class to the best of my ability every single day. Sometimes it will be ultra interesting, sometimes we just have to do what we have to do.

The last, and I do mean the very last, day of school I received the results of my evals. (If I may draw your attention to a previous statement…”supposed to sit down with admin within one week of the eval”…yeah, well, didn’t happen.) So anyway…I went in for my post eval conference. I’m nervous, after all, I get to find out what he thought of my teaching…finally. The announced eval was great. I engaged the students, had control of the class. Second eval, where I was late, was a great class. He was engaged and impressed. He did have to comment on the tardiness factor, but it was pretty much a non-issue. The third he wanted to see more technology in use, and if he had come to a different class that day he would have but I chose to do things the old fashioned way in that particular class. No big. He liked the activity and the instruction.

All in all I was happy with my teaching evals. Then came the overall. Use of technology, great. Rapport with students, great. Classroom management, great. And then…WTH
“demonstrates respect, interest, & consideration for those with whom he/she interacts” 2
“participates in collegial efforts without giving up individual rights to dissent or to work to effect change” 2

and again I say, WTH? WTF? Whatever you want to add. 2s? TWOS? What the freakin’ Crap!

Let me explain…apparently those he talked to on faculty did not feel I was social enough and they couldn’t get to know me. First, he apparently didn’t ask the people who ACTUALLY FREAKIN’ BOTHERED TO ASSOCIATE WITH ME! Most of the faculty barely bothered to say ten words to me all year. I spent a good bit of time with several who were nice, helpful, and friendly. The other guys would make eye contact only if there was no way to avoid it. I am not a jump in there and be social kind of girl…and even less so when it is obvious that there is no room for another social playmate! The other thing, I am not there to “hang out” I’m there to work. I am going to focus on the activity or meeting that is required and do what needs to be done. Not there for a party. Goofing off in a faculty meeting, making unnecessary (and in some cases inappropriate) comments is just not my style. The few times I did participate I was informed that “(you) just don’t know our kids yet, you’ll see.”

It really hacked me off that I scored rather well on everything except this one area that is a very personal judgment. I really got to know several people that I worked with. One approached me the first week and offered her assistance with anything I needed. Two others I spent a significant amount of time talking to either during lunch or after school. The in-clique was very closed. Never once did they invite me to join them for lunch…despite the fact that most of us had lunch the same period. They did not stop me in the hall and ask if I understood the testing/grading/book requirements. No, that was the first teacher. When my Dad’s died, they didn’t say a word. No, it was those few who were accepting of me from day one that I was social with. Unfortunately, those are not the teachers that admin consulted regarding my social interaction.

When I leave this school I won’t look back.[/private]

Lacking anything better to write about I thought I would share a cat story that my aunt finds less than amusing.

My young cousins want pets. They’ve had rats and fish, both not working out well for the fam. Rats and fish require more work than one would imagine and fish are not that cuddly. Come to think of it, neither are rats. Well, at least for me they are not cuddly. I can’t get past the nasty rat tail. Anyway, time passes and the young cousins talk Mawmaw and Pawpaw into a kitten that was being given away at a yard sale. How sweet, a tiny kitten. As they drove away with the new family member the youngest cousin was becoming rather distressed at kitten’s tiny meows. *Small sad voice* “Pawpaw, we havta go back. She misses her brudder. Sisters and brudders shouldn be sepraded.”

Wrapped around her little finger as he is, Pawpaw and Mawmaw return to find that the last kitten has been freely given to an individual about to depart. Not wanting young cousins to be saddened by the separated kitty siblings Pawpaw bargains with the new kitty owner. After some discussion and a little money exchange, Pawpaw reunites the kitty siblings and they head home. The meowing was now in happiness at being reunited…I’m sure.

Without resources for young kitty care, Mawmaw and Pawpaw deposit the kittens at home and head to the store with young cousins so that proper supplies can be purchases. The kittens should be fine in the fenced in back yard, right?

The young cousins return from the store, excited to play with their new pets, only to find them missing. *sadness- cue the violins*

Where could they be? Poor devastated young cousins can not be consoled. Youngest cousin cries herself to sleep with Mawmaw by her side.

Wrapped around their little fingers as he is, Pawpaw decides to take Oldest Cousin to find another cat. They find the perfect one. Bigger than the others this one is multicolored and according to the giver she is already “fixed” and has her shots. What a find! Youngest Cousin is going to be so happy.

Back at the house…Pawpaw and Oldest Cousin return with the new kitty. Youngest Cousin is awakened from her nap to be taken to the back yard and discover the new addition. All four venture to the back yard so that Youngest Cousin can be made happy again. Guess what they find…

Yep, a young cat and two kittens that came out of hiding.

Mawmaw is not happy. Young cousins are thrilled. What is better than a big sister for two young siblings!

I found this story absolutely amusing…but there’s more…

I went to visit shortly after the kitties were obtained. The big sister was very pretty. She wasn’t very old, maybe a year. I asked Pawpaw about the spaying. I was curious if the giver had said she was definitely spayed or if she thought she was. Curious of the story because it didn’t look like big sister kitty had missed any meals and I couldn’t find a scar.

(You know where this is going don’t you?)

Pawpaw confirmed that it is what she said and said he wouldn’t know if it had been spayed or not. I gently let him know that I didn’t think so and he may want to watch it. I did not share this information with Mawmaw. She was still getting used to the idea of three cats.

Guess who was right. My aunt informed me that the giving lady flat out lied. The kittens weren’t completely weaned and the Big sister kitty is going to be mommy kitty. She doesn’t just have a tight tummy these days. She’s rather round with alien like movement and should add to the kitty pool soon.

Should be interesting.

Well, I guess I can wish happy father’s day to the daddy’s out there.

Jem decided to indulge me in a day of nature appreciation. We began by packing a picnic and driving north on the Natchez Trace. Beautiful scenery and great places to stop for a quick history lesson or short nature hike. We chose to stop at a place called Holly and enjoy our lunch. While there we played on the rocks and climbed the short trail. After a much enjoyed lunch we continued north and then saw a sign for the David Crocket State Park. It was something new so we embraced the adventure. Definitely a place to visit again. We sampled the hiking and I was able to take several really good pics. Take a look…

Today was decoration day for my Grandfather’s folk. A very old cemetery, the girls were fascinated by the old headstones and antebellum dates. They were saddened by the fact that so many infants and children were buried there. It is difficult for us to fathom a world without modern medicine.

As we arrived we were greeted by a few familiar faces, but for me there were more that were unfamiliar. As a child, Gran entertained me with stories of my Grandfather’s family. The names were familiar, but I couldn’t put names with faces. As I would introduce myself I had to also explain my lineage and introduce my own children. I didn’t feel too bad about not knowing most people. After all, they didn’t recognize me either. However, they at least had a point of reference after introductions. I began to wonder, what must this be like for my aunts?

My Grandfather’s sisters both suffer from Alzheimer’s disease. On Saturday I stopped by Aunt C’s house to visit with her and my great aunt N who is afflicted with this terrible disease. Aunt N still knows the names of her children, but gets them confused. She struggles to walk, and has to have help with daily tasks. When I came to visit it had to be terribly confusing for her. It was me and the girls and my oldest looks just like I did at the same age. Aunt N asked Aunt C if she knew who I looked like. Aunt C tried to get her to say by asking who she thought I looked like, but Aunt N told her that she asked first. AD has not stolen her stubbornness. We visited for a while and talked with frequent reminders of who I was. Sunday, decoration day, Aunt N knew someone had come to visit the day before but she was confused about who it was. We reminded her who I was again and my youngest took a place beside Aunt N. It was the cutest thing to watch. Lil Bit knew that Aunt N is a very special person and that she now needs special consideration. Lil Bit took to entertaining her for the afternoon. She called me over because Aunt N wanted to tell me something…She and Lil Bit wanted strawberries and grapes. I got them a plate of fruit and gave to Lil Bit. It was easier for her to hold it steady. It was really cute to see them sharing a plate of fruit and Lil Bit feeding grapes to my 86 year old aunt.

My 90 year old Aunt H also has AD. Although she has been symptomatic for longer, she is responding differently than Aunt N. Aunt H is as happy as can be and physically able to get into all kinds of trouble if she chooses. When I said hello to her she responded with a smile, “I don’t know anything these days, who are you?” She greeted everyone with a smile and a hug or kiss, then asked who they were. She’s rather self sufficient, but dangerously so because her memory is so poor. Around time to go she was entertaining herself on her little get about scooter. She would ride around in a circle and stop in front of you to say she would take you for a ride if she had a trailer. It was really the cutest sight.

I can remember her taking me for four wheeler rides twenty years ago and worrying because she was going so fast…keep in mind she is 90 now.

Despite the fact that she has suffered with AD for years, I was told that after I left she picked up a picture of all her family lined up in the cotton fields and named every person in it. That picture was taken about 70 years ago, or more.

This post is just a brief glimpse of the day. It is so sad to see someone who has had their memory stolen by AD. As I recall the day I am so proud of my girls for taking the repeated introductions in stride. I am also impressed with how Lil Bit responded to Aunt N and embraced her as she was and made her comfortable. It is impressive to see an 8 year old show such compassion as they care for another. I wish my girls could have known my aunts as they really were. They would have had so much fun on Aunt H’s farm, playing with her animals and going for rides through the fields. Lil Bit, my artsy child, would have enjoyed painting and crafting with Aunt N. Lil Bit doesn’t see her as disabled. She just sees her as the very special person that she has always been. She just needs more help now…and according to Lil Bit, candy would be a perfect gift for our next visit.

AD is so cruel.

Went to see Indy 4 this eve. An Indy movie for Indy fans. It was fun and entertaining with the Indy wit thrown in for amusement. Indy is still the ultimate history teacher. Some say there is nothing new in Indy 4, but I must disagree. I think a little Scientology influence can be seen. However, it is everything you expect in an Indy film. Fun archeology plagued by myth and legend, with a lot of action thrown in. Although 19 years have past, Indy’s still got it…fear of snakes and a fighting spirit too. It also sets the stage for another generation. One must wonder what the future holds for Dr. Jones…